Gender Bias

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In a world where "I want it all!" and "You can’t have it all!" are often pitted against each other like a dramatic soap opera plot twist, gender bias has somehow managed to grab popcorn and settle into the audience seats. [Gender bias is an unfair difference in the way women and men are treated. It occurs when one individual unconsciously attributes certain attitudes and stereotypes to another person or group of people.] The latest episode of this ongoing saga is brought to you by the ever-present, never-boring hypocrisy of gender bias. Buckle up as we navigate through the land of double standards with a sprinkling of sarcasm and a hefty dose of eye rolls

Unfortunately, gender bias has been around since long before the founding of our great nation and, given the prevalence of modern gender bias issues, it looks like very little has changed in that regard. So much for our claims of having a "more civilized" society.

"You can roll that stone to the top of the hill, drag your ball and chain behind you. You can carry that weight with an iron will or let the pain remain behind you."

Let's start with the great work-life balance debate. Back in the medieval era, women were considered delicate flowers that needed protection from the rough and tumble world. This meant they were often confined to roles like "maiden in distress" or "damsel in the tower." Their career options were basically limited to marrying a knight or becoming a nun, and even then, their roles were less "Queen of the Realm" and more "Queen of the Kitchen."

In our modern era, it's a dazzling paradox where women are told they should be able to juggle a career, family, and social life with the ease of a circus performer — while also being criticized for any hint of struggle. Meanwhile, men are celebrated for simply being competent in their careers, occasionally making it home for dinner, and are somehow viewed as “superheroes” for this mediocre achievement. So, women are supposed to be superhumanly perfect at everything, while men just need to show up. It’s like being asked to run a marathon while wearing a ball gown and high heels — then being told you’re not trying hard enough if you don’t finish first.

Medieval women were generally thought to be better off knitting and brewing potions than engaging in intellectual pursuits. If a woman wanted to study, she had two choices: be an abbess with access to a scriptorium or be a well-educated witch. Both, let’s face it, came with their own set of limitations. In today’s world, women can be found at the highest levels of academia and in cutting-edge tech fields. The barrier is less about access to knowledge and more about how to balance work and life while battling persistent stereotypes about “women’s roles.” Modern women can be CEOs, scientists, leaders, and even generals on the battlefield—though sometimes they still need to fight for that role. Fictional heroines are now portrayed as complex characters with their own arcs, though the challenge now is to ensure they’re not just token figures.

"Carve away the stone, carve away the stone. Make a graven image with some features of your own."

Speaking of balance, let’s talk about salaries. The gender pay gap is like that one awkward uncle who insists on talking politics at every family gathering. It’s just not going away, no matter how much we try to avoid it. Women are often told that they need to negotiate better, work harder, and be more assertive to earn the same as their male counterparts. But when women do exactly that, they’re labeled as “pushy” or “aggressive.” Ah, yes, because “being assertive” and “being annoying” are essentially the same thing when you’re wearing a skirt.

When it comes to parenting, gender bias takes on the guise of a 1950's TV sitcom where women are expected to be the supermom while men get to be the “cool dad” who occasionally changes a diaper. Women are criticized if they work too much, and if they stay home, they're often asked why they’re not doing more to contribute financially. Men, on the other hand, can be applauded for simply showing up to parent-teacher meetings. So, the moral of the story is: If you’re a mom, you’re not doing enough; if you’re a dad, you’re doing just fine.

"Chip away the stone, chip away the stone. Make the burden lighter if you must roll that rock alone."

Leadership roles are another prime example of gender bias with a side of hypocrisy. In medieval times, the idea of a woman taking up arms and leading a charge into battle was as likely as finding a unicorn in your backyard. Joan of Arc was the ultimate exception, and even she had to wear pants and defy the conventional wisdom of her time. Her bravery made waves because, you know, it was so unexpected!

Fast forward to today, and women are often criticized for being too aggressive if they’re assertive leaders, but if they’re empathetic, they’re accused of being “soft” or “emotional.” Men, however, are rarely asked to balance this tightrope of expectations. They’re just expected to lead and be admired for doing so, while women are caught in an endless loop of trying to figure out the “right way” to lead without offending someone.

"You can drive those wheels to the end of the road, you will still find the past behind you. Try to deny the weight of the load, try to put the sins of the past behind you."

Finally, let’s not forget the beauty bias. Women are scrutinized for their appearance in ways that would make even the most seasoned fashion critic’s head spin. They’re told they need to be attractive but not too attractive, professional but not too severe, and youthful but not naïve. Men? They just need to show up and maybe occasionally shave. If only women could get away with just one universally accepted look, the beauty industry would be out of business, and we could all have a little more time to focus on things that matter — like figuring out why our coffee makers always seem to break down right when we need them most.

But there is an underlying and, quite frankly, more Machiavellian aspect to the insistence of traditional gender roles in our culture; one that seeks to thrust an entire segment of our society into second-class citizenship, or worse; slavery. Not only are women, regardless of age, social position, or individual ability, being systematically stripped of their rights to have *any* voice in their own future, they are now also being stripped of their own *bodily autonomy*, but that's really a topic all on its own. Here's what seems strange and unusual to me. There are actually women out there who are 'actively advocating' for the repeal of those hard-won rights granted to women even in the past century. Seriously, what gives? Personally, it would not surprise me to find out that the primary lifegoal of these women was (and is) to simply be a trophy wife.

So, why do I care about gender bias? One reason, and one alone: I have three daughters, and all of them are amazing young women, and I want THEM to have every success that their individual talents will allow them. The hypocrisy of gender bias is a masterpiece of double standards and absurd expectations, where the rules are perpetually changing based on who you are and what everyone else thinks you're supposed to be. It’s a show with no end in sight, featuring performances that would make even the most stoic of us crack a smile at the sheer ridiculousness of it all.

"Roll away the stone, roll away the stone. If you could just move yours, I could get working on my own."

Medieval gender bias was more about literal and figurative entrapment: think towers and chains. Modern bias is subtler, more about invisible barriers and systemic challenges, often dressed up in a suit and tie rather than armor and a horse. Both eras share a common thread: the occasional heroic woman breaking through the mold. The big difference? Today, we’ve swapped our “damsels in distress” for “bosses in boardrooms” and are working on making that swap permanent.